Episode show notes
Today, in episode 38 of the Soulfully Confident Podcast, we are talking all about boundaries with ourselves, in our relationships, and in our life. In this episode, I want to help stop you from getting mixed up with your boundaries, especially in relationships so that you are not trying to control somebody else.
But before we dive right in, let me introduce myself in case this is your first visit. Welcome to the Soulfully Confident Podcast! I’m your host, Emily Elizabeth, creator of the Soulfully Abundant Group Coaching program and certified Life Coach. This podcast is for the person who feels insecure, lost, and wants more from life but feels stuck. It is for the person who is ready to claim their confidence, self-worth, and take back control of their life. In this podcast, we will cover topics including self-love, managing your emotions, reconnecting in your relationships, and even manifestation. Remember, you are loved, you are worthy, and you are so capable of anything you want to achieve. Let’s jump in!
Check out the points below to learn more about healthy boundaries. For even more details on each point, listen to ALL of episode 38 of the Soulfully Confident Podcast on your preferred streaming platform!
What a boundary is and how to communicate them properly.
A boundary is something that you create for yourself. Sometimes boundaries are not always necessary but when they are, they can create some amazing results. Boundaries are set for ourselves and they should always be set out of self-love and kindness. It is a way to honor your emotional well being and not manipulate somebody else into doing what you want them to do. That’s not what boundaries are about! So many people do this and blame others for the way they are feeling. We all have boundaries that don't always need to be shared with everyone. They are just something we honor within ourselves and that's good enough. There are also times when we do need to clearly communicate our boundaries because if we don't, the boundary will be violated and then we react and snap. The person that we react to will be in shock because we never communicated that boundary properly.
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What is and isn't a boundary violation.
Here's an example. I don't like smoking in my home, so you can’t smoke cigarettes in my house. I let my friend who smokes know that if they want to smoke while here, they have to step outside because I don't like it. That's my boundary. That person knows very clearly now that there's no smoking allowed in my house. Now on the other hand, if that person is smoking in their own home, that is not a boundary violation because I can't control their behavior. The boundary violation would be them coming to my house, knowing I have a smoking boundary, and doing it anyways. You have to make your boundary clear and be honest with that person so that there are no violations or shocks. You don't always have to be a people pleaser, and sit there and let people violate your feelings and boundaries. If you don't feel comfortable with something, say it and speak up even if you're scared about what they're going to think of you. If you step into a place of honesty with yourself and the people around you, you'll feel so much more comfortable and you won't have any boundary violations.
Don't set boundaries around negative emotions.
Set your boundaries out of self-love, kindness, respect, and honesty. That is where boundaries should always be set and so many people fail to do this. They set their boundaries out of frustration, wanting control, and manipulation. That’s not what boundaries are! Boundaries should never be set to manipulate somebody. They should be set from a place of self-respect and what you believe in. If somebody doesn't respect your boundary, let them think whatever they want about you. It always says more about them than it does about you. That’s why boundaries should always be set in the most loving and clear way so nobody gets hurt or has different opinions. It is such a relief to tell people what you're feeling and what you want out of love and not hate.
How To Create Healthy Boundaries: The Bottomline
I hope this episode helps you set healthy boundaries in your life and your relationships. Have fun with uncovering your boundaries, but in a healthy and self-loving way. Remember to never mix up boundaries with manipulation. You can't change somebody else's behavior but you can always communicate your feelings and boundaries in a kind way.
To hear more about how to create healthy boundaries, don’t forget to tune in to episode 38 of the Soulfully Confident Podcast.
Thank you SO much for tuning in to the Soulfully Confident Podcast! I hope this episode helps you figure out what type of boundaries you want to have in your life. If you enjoyed this episode, please take a few seconds to leave a rating and review. Each review helps me reach more women looking for confidence just like you.
Also! Don’t forget to take a screenshot, share it in your Instagram stories with your biggest takeaway, and tag me @emilyelizabethcoaching! Can’t wait until the next episode!
About your host
My name is Emily Elizabeth, I am a life and confidence coach, and I am ready to help you take back your confidence and feel in control of your life.
I love helping women get out of the victim mentality, find their self-worth, and reconnect with themselves so they can not only improve themselves but all their relationships. When I am not creating content for my clients and programs, you can find me on a spontaneous trip with my husband, working out, curled up with my journal, or spending time enjoying the outdoors.
What I want to do for you all today is a little guided meditation, visualizations, and affirmations that I say a lot to myself and guide my clients through as well.