Stop talking so much shit.
Yes, you. You are so guilty of this. Don’t think I’m not talking to you.
You’re insulting, rude and just mean.
You do it everyday.
You are the villain.
But, you’re also the victim.
So, Who are you so horrible to?
Yourself.
Either you know this is true so clearly or it’s on a subconscious level, or somewhere in between.
We all do it. We are our own worst critic.
I see this in my clients all the time.
Layering self-criticism on top of guilt, fear, disappointment, sadness, stress, anxiety, and whatever else they are feeling that they don’t want to.
I do it too. I think we all do.
But, the difference between me and you is that I see it as it is happening, I allow the thought without letting it spiral into a negative, self loathing train wreck.
I don’t want to be so mean to myself anymore. It doesn’t push me and motivate me to do better. And, it doesn’t feel good.
We have this idea that we need to punish ourselves when we mess up, when we don’t get the job, don’t lose the weight, fight with our partner, miss a deadline, yell at our kid, don’t start a business, or start even a small step towards what we want in life. We feel badly about ourselves for not doing what we want so badly, we don’t understand why we don’t take action so we decided to instead insult ourselves because, after-all, we deserve it. Right? We deserve to be punished for being overweight, in a job we hate, in a bad relationship, for over-drinking or other bad habits we are trying to quit and just can’t.
We look around and see all these other people doing well. We compare, Not just their success to ours but also their looks. We go to the mirror and criticize every role, wrinkle, blemish, curve, freckle and anything else to dig your hole deeper...because you deserve it.
What does this do for you? Nothing. We think this is what will kick our ass into gear. Wrong. It tears us down and we feel horrible, and when we feel horribly we don’t take the right action to get to where we want to be.
Be kind to yourself. Love yourself. I promise, if you love yourself now exactly as you are it does not mean you won’t change. We have this messed up perception...For example, if we love our body we won’t lose weight, we have to hate it and insult it in order to change. No, no, no. Love your body, yourself, and you absolutely will be able to reach your health goals, carreer goals, love goals, whatever goals.
You see, when we are kind and loving to ourselves we feel good. When we feel good we take action in ways that serve us.
Love yourself on your way to your goal. Love yourself on the way to bettering yourself.
So, ask yourself...
Are you ready to stop being your own villain? Are you ready to start loving yourself?
With love,
Emily Elizabeth